My oldest boy had a birthday recently. He's in his early twenties. Ever since he turned 21 I don't bother trying to contact him anymore. I don't want to bug him. On that day he changed his name to her name, so I guess that's how he feels. Divorce lawyers and domestic law mental-health "counselors" had a field day spoiling his childhood, in my opinion. Good job, Joe, Bill, Vic and especially you Meg, along with your allegedly intimate friend who "advised" you that your deep conflict in "treating" both mother and child concurrently was okay. I'm working hard on forgiveness in my heart for the likes of you all.
The plus side is he'll always be 14 in my mind, because really, that's the last time I knew him although he lives 2 miles away with his mother, still. He was a small, fast boy who was a superior although not gifted athlete. He made things happen for his team. Here's a "memories" piece I wrote 8 years ago when his rec basketball team rode him at guard and J at small forward to the championship game.
In the finals, no one thought HB had a chance. VT had a superior big man to counter J, and 3 good guards with size, including the league's best player, with which to overwhelm HB's smallish guards.
But J along with HB's very physical forward equalized the court down low for HB. Jimmy didn't panic when HB fell behind early and brought his team back evenly so they eventually forged ahead, with Jimmy neutralizing the play of the big guards and using his quickness and passing ability to move the ball around and control the tempo.
When Jimmy sat out the 2d period, the game became faster-paced and HB fell behind by 7. Then Jimmy re-entered the game and slowly HB caught back up and took the lead. Whenever VT mounted a charge, Jimmy shut them down by getting the ball to the shooting guard for a perimeter shot or to J down low for a short jumper. Although he was having an off night shooting, Jimmy put in some strategic points, knocking down a crucial J and scoring twice close in. He got some rebounds and kept the ball out of the hands of the stars on VT. He scored 7 points as HB won 54-40 going away because of HB's excellent chemistry, forced upon VT by Jimmy's methodical play and complemented by J's usual outstanding game and the solid contributions of every other teammate fulfilling his role.
It was a beautiful game to watch, seeing how the smallest (and quickest and maybe the sharpest, although not the best) player on the court delivered the championship for his team. [Fatherly pride.]
I can still hear the sneakers squeak and see Jimmy leaning forward with the ball in his hands, about to do something with it.
Happy Birthday, Jimmy. I hope you're well.
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7 comments:
I hope someday you are able to reconcile with your kids. Meanwhile, loving them unconditionally is the mark of a strong person. I'm proud to know you, Peter.
The last line says it all.
In my experience, bitterness can fade with time.
I wish you the best day you can have today under these difficult circumstances.
this breaks my heart, but that's nothing compared to what it must do to yours.
:(
Clearly, you are an inspiration.
As you live with excruciating loss and perpetual grief,
wishing you enduring courage and hope.
Happy Birthday, Jimmy.
Well said.
Peter, I keep hoping for a sunny afternoon on a weekend so I can go and get some shots of the Wynkwn, Blynken and Nod statue that you admired so. I think that it triggered something insoide of you that was pleasant & intimate.
I feel your pain.
Wish you all the best Peter.
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