I received an I-Phone today at work, so as of 4 pm on April 2, 2015 my life was transformed! I went around to all my friends at work staring at the implement assigned to me, an I-Phone 6 so no big deal apparently, telling them that my life had been transformed by receipt of this device and that I was practicing worshipping my palm (with this miraculous God-device cradled within my palm).
They stated to me that I was expressing annoyance at this fantastic occurrence in my life (an I-Phone!). Perhaps I was exhibiting frustration already because i) I couldn't see at my age the screen without taking off my glasses and ii) my finger was apparently too fat to tap correctly on the virtual keyboard,
When I went home at the end of the workday I left it on my work shelf, along with its box of parts and instructions. I have no doubt it'll still be there the day I retire.
I hope they don't come before then, like the bully manager did a couple of years ago inquiring about this miracle device's predecessor, a work Blackberry, that an IT audit had disclosed had never been turned on. I couldn't give that unasked for implement back to them then (no I didn't sell it on ebay, nor did I ever ask to receive it); this 'game changer' is an equally unwanted, strangling, work horse collar that I don't want to be a part of.