A New Phone

I activated my true smart phone, an android, last Thanksgiving after it sat on my shelf unused for two years.  I was happy all that time with my old dumb smartphone which had a slide-out tactile keyboard that was good for sending texts and made and received calls, so why swap it out for a complicated android after it arrived once I upgraded my service plan to receive for the same monthly rate unlimited call minutes, unlimited texting and the new phone.

I visited my sister for Thanksgiving and she forced me to activate the android, a THC which was already obsolete by then and no longer sold.  I hated it, couldn't figure it out, went on the internet only once (to look up an address) with it which apparently unleashed a horde of genies into my phone and thereupon it ran 24 hours a day, hogged data (16GBs every 10 days), sent me weird texts from entities I didn't know concerning phantom orders I'd made and rogue deliveries that were coming and I finally went to the Verizon store to change my phone and my service.

Unfortunately, it was staffed by three young people, all twenty-somethings who spoke in very heavily-accented English and I couldn't understand what they were saying whenever the discussion turned technical.  I told them the reason I was switching from AT&T was because it had hired the grifter lawyer Michael Cohen for $400,000 to provide access to our corrupt president, but not one of them knew who Michael Cohen was.

I asked them if they had ever heard of Robert Mueller but I drew three more blank stares.  They tried to upsell me on a "jump pack" and/or a "Hum" to "bundle" with the phone, useless accessories so much as I could even follow what they were talking about and I left the store with my old, hated phone still a part of my life and a troubling suspicion that this country is in deep trouble.